This morning, at 5:32 am (hence morning), I was standing in front of my bathroom mirror. My hair was dripping wet, my eyes were half way closed, and I stood there staring at the knot in my hair dryer cord trying to build up the energy to de-knot it. I asked myself, “ Why I do this? Why do I agree to get up at the butt crack of dawn to get on a bus and spend the whole day at a speech contest?”
My life goes a little like this:
February 10, 12, & 13: Follies.
Before follies I had many late nights of rehearsals in preparation of the show.
I don’t even get a break to catch up on sleep and homework before the next big thing starts.
Thursday 17: Day one of dance team tryouts. After spending the day at school ( not by choice) I go to DT tryouts. Later that evening, I help out a few friends + homework.
Friday 18: Day two of dance team tryouts. After dancing I help some girls with the dances until late in the evening out of my generosity.
Saturday 19: spend most of the day at the studio dancing and helping people.
Sunday 20: [{God’s day} church] Tryouts! That extremely stressful and took several hours out of the day. Then I got to do homework for the rest of the night.
Now for this past week:
Monday: I don’t remember this day but I’m pretty sure I came home from school and completely crashed. I got up later and did some more damn homework.
Tuesday: Right away after school, I get my allergies shots. Tuesday is also the night I assist teach dance. –later more homework.
Wednesday: homework then dance till sometime after 10.
Thursday: I had to help my mother with something that should have taken less then a ½ hour but accumulated to about 3 hours. Then I spent the rest of the evening doing homework and trying to get my photos together to turn in the next day for the CIML art show.
Friday: I was having troubles with the photos; so in the morning I got up early to print them. I ended up going to Hy-vee drug store 3 times. 3 Times! The machines were having trouble reading the format from which my photos were saved as. I had to go buy some photo paper, some ink cartridge, and go to a friend’s house to print the photos that didn’t turn out how they were suppose to. I stayed at school until 5pm handing in my photos for the CIML art contest and preparing my speech with my teacher.
Saturday: I got up at 5am to go to a speech contest that took all day. Exhausted from the week, I fell asleep on the gym bleachers in Riceville.
Busy is the adjective to describe my life. I get very little sleep. My room is always messy; because by the end of the day, It’s my last concern with the very little energy I have. I have homework every single day because I do not take study halls. I’ve never had a study hall and I don’t know what I’d do with myself if I had one anyways. There are too many things I want to do to waste a period of the day in a study hall. There is no internet at my house at the moment. It is not working so doing homework is even more difficult when I have to change my location to get it done. I miss my friends. I rarely get to see them or hang out with them because I always have something going on. When I do get to see them, I’m not as energetic at they are because chances are if I have time to see them then I’m not moving in hyper mode trying to get something done. My body is falling apart and I am tired.
This is normal for me. If it wasn’t this it would be something else.
So why do I do this?
I do this because I love too. This is how I have always been. I love to be involved and do something worth wild. I know that if I didn’t keep busy I would be even more of a procrastinator. I wouldn’t know how to function. Because I have very little time, it condenses me to doing the stuff I need to do now rather than putting it off because I will have time later. I feel bad for the kids that never get to experience something equivalent to state or districts, or any sort of high pressure competition. To never feel the stress, rush, and pressure that drives you would not be worth everything else you have to go through in this crappy time period of your life. Weather you win or lose, the journey that builds you up (that builds your character) is worth it in the end. My accomplishments mean so much more to me because I know I’ve earned it, and that is something I can take with me for the rest of my life.
So I will continue to get up in the morning with my dripping wet hair, come home late at night, and do again the next day.
I was asked, “Do you think you are a hard worker?”
My answer is yes. I work hard at trying to keep sane.
Hang on spring break is in a week:)
ReplyDeleteI honestly think your insane Shannon. You come to school and you always seem so cheery and happy, and when I talk to you your so busy i can't wrap my brain around it. I wouldn't be able to manage, but i appluade you in your efforts. If i were you i'd make some time for yourself, its doesn't have to be very long, like 10-30 minutes a day if you got it
ReplyDeleteStudy halls are very pointless. I agree with you. Sitting in the cafeteria or some random teacher's classroom for 50 minutes is a waste of time. I'd rather spend that time learning something instead of staring at the window/wall.
ReplyDeleteI hate study halls! Last year I had one and I didn't even do homework in it. All I did was write really long notes that I would give to my friend after class. I couldn't believe that I would sit there picking at my split ends for 50 minutes everyday. Completely ridiculous. I refuse to take a study hall for the rest of my highschool career.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I saw your photographs in the art room and I really enjoyed them! They were funny. :)